RobinJerauld.com
Tax Quotes
The term "tax humor" is no doubt an oxymoron to many people; to the more cynical, it is an apt description of the entire tax code.
John F. Lekel
Basic tax, as everyone knows, is the only genuinely funny subject in law school.
Martin Ginsburg
I am proud to be paying taxes in the United States. The only thing is, I could be just as proud for half the money.
Arthur Godfrey
I hold in my hand 1,379 pages of tax simplification.
Delbert L. Latta
I bet that if you actually read the entire vastness of the U.S. Tax Code, you'd find at least one sex scene.
Dave Barry
Internal Revenue Service: The world's most successful mail order business.
Bob Goddard
Be wary of strong drink. It can make you shoot at tax collectors, and miss.
Lazarus Long
I owe the government $3,400 in taxes. So I sent them two hammers and a toilet seat.
Sue Murphy
Save our Trees. Stop Printing Tax Forms!
Bumper Sticker
Big business never pays a nickel in taxes, according to Ralph Nader, who represents a big consumer organization that never pays a nickel in taxes.
Dave Barry
I believe we should all pay our tax bill with a smile. I tried but they wanted cash.
Anonymous
Intaxication: Euphoria at getting a refund from the IRS, which lasts until you realize it was your money to start with.
From a Washington Post word contest
Income tax returns are the most imaginative fiction being written today.
Herman Wouk
IRS: We make money the old-fashioned way: we steal it!
Bumper Sticker
If the Lord had meant us to pay income taxes, he'd have made us smart enough to prepare the return.
Kirk Kirkpatrick
Contrary to what some people claim, the tax laws have a lot of respect for logic. They use it so sparingly.
Jeffrey L. Yablon
Why does a slight tax increase cost you $200 and a substantial tax cut saves you 30 cents?
Peg Bracken
State-run lotteries: Think of them as tax breaks for the intelligent.
Evan Leibovitch
It's getting so that children have to be educated to realize that 'Damn' and 'Taxes' are two separate words.
Anonymous
IRS: We've got what it takes to take what you've got.
Bumper Sticker
Death and taxes are both certain . . . But at least death isn't annual.
Anonymous
If Patrick Henry thought that taxation without representation was bad, he should see how bad it is with representation.
Farmer's Almanac
Your federal government needs your money so that it can perform vital services for you that you would not think up yourself in a million years.
Dave Barry
You must pay taxes. But there's no law that says you gotta leave a tip.
Morgan Stanley advertisement
A fool and his money are soon parted. It takes creative tax laws for the rest.
Bob Thaves
What Mae West said about sex is true about taxes. All tax cuts are good tax cuts; even bad tax cuts are good tax cuts.
Grover Norquist
I shall never use profanity except in discussing house rent and taxes.
Mark Twain
I want to find out who this FICA guy is and how come he's taking so much of my money.
Nick Kypreos
Nothing guarantees more applause and more support than the call to abolish the IRS.
Frank Luntz
Late one night, just blocks from the Capitol, a mugger jumped into the path of a well-dressed fellow and stuck a gun in his ribs. "Give me your money," the thief demanded. "Are you kidding?" the man said. "I'm a U.S. congressman." "In that case," the mugger growled, cocking his weapon, "give me my money."
Anonymous
Tax simplification is complicated stuff.
Pam Olson
Tax laws are constantly changing as our elected representatives seek new ways to ensure that whatever tax advice we receive is incorrect.
Dave Barry
Suggested simplified tax form: How much money did you make last year? Mail it in.
Stanton Delaplane
I wouldn't mind paying taxes, if I knew they were going to a friendly country.
Dick Gregory
Q. I understand that
Congress is considering a so-called "flat" tax system. How would this
work?
A. If Congress were to pass a "flat" tax, you'd simply pay a fixed
percentage of your income, and you wouldn't have to fill out any
complicated forms, and there would be no loopholes for politically
connected groups, and normal people would actually understand the tax
laws, and giant talking broccoli stalks would come around and mow your
lawn for free, because Congress is NOT going to pass a flat tax, you
pathetic fool.
Dave Barry
Q:
How do you know you've
met a good tax accountant?
A: He has a loophole named after him.
Anonymous
Q: How many tax
advisors does it take to change a light bulb?
A: In the summer there is a tax deductible convention in Hawaii, dealing
exactly with this issue.
Anonymous
The federal income tax system is a disgrace to the human race.
Jimmy Carter
Taxpayer: Someone who works for the government but doesn't have to take a civil service examination.
Ronald Reagan
It is a paradoxical truth, that tax rates are too high today, and tax revenues are too low, and the soundest way to raise the revenues in the long run is to cut the tax rates.
John F. Kennedy
Collecting more taxes than is absolutely necessary is legalized robbery.
Calvin Coolidge
My opponent won't rule out raising taxes, but I will. Congress will push me to raise taxes, and I'll say no, and they'll push, and I'll say no, and they'll push and I'll say, "Read my lips: no new taxes."
George H.W. Bush, before raising taxes
I have no intention of raising taxes.
Bill Clinton, before raising taxes
Our federal tax system is, in short, utterly impossible, utterly unjust and completely counterproductive [it] reeks with injustice and is fundamentally un-American... it has earned a rebellion and it's time we rebelled.
Ronald Reagan, May 1983, Williamsburg, VA
An economy hampered by excessive tax rates will never produce enough revenue to balance our budget, just as it will never produce enough jobs or enough profits.
John F. Kennedy
Your profits are going to be cut down to a reasonably low level by taxation. Your income will be subject to higher taxes. Indeed in these days, when every available dollar should go to the war effort, I do not think that any American citizen should have a net income in excess of $25,000 per year after payment of taxes.
Franklin Delano Roosevelt's Radio Broadcast, April 28, 1942
The collection of any taxes which are not absolutely required, which do not beyond reasonable doubt contribute to the public welfare, is only a species of legalized larceny.
Calvin Coolidge
Government's view of the economy could be summed up in a few short phrases: If it moves, tax it. If it keeps moving, regulate it. And if it stops moving, subsidize it.
Ronald Reagan
When more of the people's sustenance is exacted through the form of taxation than is necessary to meet the just obligations of government and expenses of its economical administration, such exaction becomes ruthless extortion and a violation of the fundamental principles of a free government.
Grover Cleveland
I want to be sure that he is a ruthless son of a bitch, that he will do what he is told, that every income tax return I want to see, I see.
President Richard Nixon commenting on the kind of IRS Commissioner he wanted
Blessed are the young, for they shall inherit the national debt.
Herbert Hoover
There's a lot of evidence you can sell people on tax increases if they think it's an investment.
Bill Clinton
The difference in spending habits between government and a drunken sailor is, at least a drunken sailor spends his own money.
Ronald Reagan
We must get rid of the IRS. It's a bureaucracy fraught with totalitarianism.
Sonny Bono
Keep your tax-cutting, greedy hands off our Medicare.
Senator Edward Kennedy, D-Mass.
There is no such thing as a good tax.
Winston Churchill
Everyone who has anything to do with the tax code agrees it's just an unbelievable mess.
Former Treasury Secretary Paul O'Neill
We contend that for a nation to try to tax itself into prosperity is like a man standing in a bucket and trying to lift himself up by the handle.
Winston Churchill
The income tax created more criminals than any other single act of government.
Barry Goldwater
I think our tax system is not worthy of an advanced society.
Former Treasury Secretary Paul O'Neill
No taxation without respiration.
Rep. Bob Schaffer, R-Colo., on repeal of the estate tax.
A tax loophole is something that benefits the other guy. If it benefits you, it is tax reform.
Senator Russell Long
I don't like the income tax. Every time we talk about these taxes we get around to the idea of 'from each according to his capacity and to each according to his needs'. That's socialism. It's written into the Communist Manifesto. Maybe we ought to see that every person who gets a tax return receives a copy of the Communist Manifesto with it so he can see what's happening to him.
T. Coleman Andrews, Former Commissioner of Internal Revenue, May 25, 1956 in US. News & World Report
The key question is: can we define 'income' in a fair and reasonably straightforward manner? Unfortunately we have not yet succeeded in doing so.
Shirley Peterson, Former IRS Commissioner, April 1993
Eight decades of amendments... to [the] code have produced a virtually impenetrable maze... The rules are unintelligible to most citizens... The rules are equally mysterious to many government employees who are charged with administering and enforcing the law.
Shirley Peterson, Former IRS Commissioner, April14, 1993 at Southern Methodist University
This [audit] was made extremely difficult because [IRS] existing Systems were not designed to provide reliable financial information... on their operations.
Comptroller Bowsher, Government Accounting Office, on the first-ever audit of the IRS in 1993.
Two years ago it was impossible to get through on the phone to the IRS. Now it's just hard to get through. That's progress.
Former IRS Commissioner Charles Rossotti
The trick is to stop thinking of it as 'your' money.
Advice given by IRS revenue agent
The hardest thing in the world to understand is the income tax.
Albert Einstein
A society which turns so many of its best and brightest into tax lawyers may be doing something wrong.
Hoffman F. Fuller
The avoidance of taxes is the only intellectual pursuit that still carries any reward.
John Maynard Keynes
The nation ought to have a tax system which looks like someone designed it on purpose.
William E. Simon
Virtually every major accounting firm is an aggressive adversary of tax simplification.
Stephan Moore, CATO Institute
It's a game. We [tax lawyers] teach the rich how to play it so they can stay rich, and the IRS keeps changing the rules so we can keep getting rich teaching them.
John Grisham, from "The Firm"
The politician's promises of yesterday are the taxes of today.
W.L. Mackenzie King
American workers spend more of their day working to pay taxes than they do to feed, clothe, and house their families.
The Tax Foundation
There is no art which one government sooner learns from another than that of draining money from the pockets of the people.
Adam Smith
All taxes paid over a lifetime by the average American are spent by the government in less than a second.
Jim Fiebig
Government expands to absorb revenue and then some.
Tom Wicker
When two-thirds of married couples are required to pay higher income taxes solely because they are married, the American public rightly loses respect for the law.
Michael Graetz
Taxes are not levied for the benefit of the taxed.
Robert Heinlein
No man's property is safe while Congress is in session.
Mark Twain
There are two distinct classes of men . . . those who pay taxes and those who receive and live upon taxes.
Thomas Paine
The very first Social Security check, for $22.54, was paid in 1940 to a Vermont woman who had paid $22 in Social Security taxes. By the time she died, in 1974, aged 100, she had collected $20,944.42.
Andrew Tobias
In general, the art of government consists of taking as much money as possible from one class of citizens to give to the other. In the matter of taxation, every privilege is an injustice.
Voltaire
Politicians can't give us anything without depriving us of something else. Government is not a god. Every dime they spend must first be taken from someone else.
Gary Asmus
The Government that robs Peter to pay Paul can always depend upon the support of Paul.
George Bernard Shaw
The art of taxation consists in so plucking the goose as to get the greatest amount of feathers with the least amount of hissing.
M. Colbert, Finance Minister to King Louis XIV
Taxes are what we pay for a civilized society.
Justice Oliver Wendell Holmes in 1904, before the federal income tax was enacted.
There is no worse tyranny than to force a man to pay for what he does not want merely because you think it would be good for him.
Robert Heinlein
Anyone may so arrange his affairs that his taxes shall be as low as possible; he is not bound to choose that pattern which will best pay the Treasury; there is not even a patriotic duty to increase one's taxes.
Judge Learned Hand
It is the duty of a good shepherd to shear his sheep, not to skin them.
Tiberius Caesar
Rulers do not reduce taxes to be kind. Expediency and greed create high taxation, and normally it takes an impending catastrophe to bring it down.
Charles Adams
There is nothing more permanent than a temporary tax.
Anonymous
To steal from one person is theft. To steal from many is taxation.
Jeff Daiell
To lay with one hand the power of government on the property of the citizen, and with the other to bestow it on favored individuals... is none the less robbery because it is... called taxation.
United States Supreme Court in Loan Association v. Topeka, 19th Century
The war against illegal plunder has been fought since the beginning of the world. But how is legal plunder to be identified? Quite simply. See if the law takes from some persons what belongs to them, and gives it to other persons to whom it does not belong. See if the law benefits one citizen at the expense of another by doing what the citizen himself cannot do without committing a crime. Then abolish this law without delay. If such a law is not abolished immediately it will spread, multiply and develop into a system.
Frederic Bastiat, "The Law" (1848)
Democracy is a form of government that cannot long survive, for as soon as the people learn that they have a voice in the fiscal policies of the government, they will move to vote for themselves all the money in the treasury, and bankrupt the nation.
Karl Marx, 1848, author of "The Communist Manifesto"
It is not the heavily taxed realm which executes great deeds but the moderately taxed one.
Old Asian Proverb
There's only one way to kill capitalism, by taxes, taxes, and more taxes.
Karl Marx
When a government is just, taxes are few.
Thomas Paine
Taxation under every form presents but a choice of evils.
David Ricardo
Giving money and power to government is like giving whisky and car keys to teenage boys.
P.J. O'Rourke
It is not too much to hope that some day we may get back on a tax basis of 10 percent, the old Hebrew tithe, which was always considered a fairly heavy tax.
Andrew Mellon
The tax evader is in every respect, an excellent citizen, had not the laws of this country made a crime which nature never meant to be so.
Adam Smith
An economy breathes through its tax loopholes.
Barry Bracewell-Milnes
Governments last as long as the under-taxed can defend themselves against the over-taxed.
Bernard Berenson
For imposing Taxes on us without our Consent . . . .
The Declaration of Independence
What is history but a fable agreed upon?
Napoleon Bonaparte
Why keep on enacting laws when we already have more than we can break?
Unknown
There ain’t no rules around here-- we're trying to accomplish something.
Thomas A. Edison
If someone makes a law that does not result in advantage for men’s dealings with each other, it no longer has the nature of justice.
Epicurus
The more laws and order are made prominent, the more thieves and robbers there will be.
Lao-tsu
Where there are too many policemen, there is no liberty. Where there are too many soldiers, there is no peace. Where there are too many lawyers, there is no justice.
Lin Yutang
Whenever the government intervenes into the market in order to achieve a specific goal, a result opposite to the official justification for the intervention will occur.
Ludwig Von Mises
Simplify and simplify, until all contamination from relative, contradictory thinking is eliminated. Then one does nothing, yet nothing is left undone.
Lao-tsu
There's a fine line between fishing and just standing on the shore like an idiot.
Steven Wright
Besides the noble art of getting things done, there is the noble art of leaving things undone. The wisdom of life consists in the elimination of non-essentials.
Lin Yutang
That which is not worth doing is not worth doing well.
Warren Buffet
Doing stuff is overrated. Hitler did a lot of stuff, but don't we all wish he had just stayed home and gotten stoned?
Dex, from the movie The Tao of Steve
The following method of inquiry must be applied to every desire: What will happen to me if what I long for is accomplished? What will happen if it is not accomplished?
Epicurus
Always listen to experts. They'll tell you what can't be done and why. Then do it.
Robert Heinlein
Everything that is, was, or ever will be started as an idea in someone’s mind.
Wally “Famous” Amos
This above all: to thine own self be true,
And it must follow, as the night the day,
Thou canst not then be false to any man.
William Shakespeare
The secret in life is figuring out who to be the batboy for.
Warren Buffet
We must become the change we wish to see.
Mahatma Gandhi
No matter how far down the wrong road you have gone, turn back.
Turkish Proverb
Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine as children do. It is not just in some of us, it is in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.
Attributed to Marianne Williamson
What you attempt if you knew there were no way you could fail?
Anonymous
Try not. Do or do not. There is no try.
Yoda, 'The Empire Strikes Back'
The man who moves a mountain begins by carrying away small stones.
Confucius
Who begins too much accomplishes little.
German Proverb
The outward freedom that we shall attain will only be in exact proportion to the inward freedom to which we may have grown at a given moment. And if this is a correct view of freedom, our chief energy must be concentrated on achieving reform from within.
Mahatma Gandhi
If your imagination leads you to understand how quickly people grant your requests when those requests appeal to their self-interest, you can have practically anything you go after.
Napolean Hill
He is richest who is content with the least.
Socrates
A life of freedom cannot acquire many possessions, since to accomplish this requires servility to the rabble or to kings.
Epicurus
The things you own end up owning you.
Tyler Derden, from the Movie Fight Club
Manifest plainness,
Embrace simplicity,
Reduce selfishness,
Have few desires.
Lao-tsu
Natural wealth is limited and easily obtained; the wealth defined by vain fancies is always beyond reach. Nothing is sufficient for the man to whom the sufficient is too little.
Epicurus
To have little is to
possess.
To have plenty is to be perplexed.
Lao-tsu
Buying a new car will not make you more virile. It won’t open whole new vistas of anything except debt. It may let you get from point A to point B and back without a major repair bill. But it will not impress any of the girls in the Sports Illustrated swimsuit issue – not even the 1973 issue. People spend their lives trying to make up for a lost fantasy, or trying to get even with a past fantasy. You can’t get even with a past fantasy. Fantasies only improve with time. That’s why Sports Illustrated never provides a special feature on "The Girls of 1973 . . . Today!"
Gary North
Those desires that do not lead to pain, if they are not fulfilled, are not necessary. They involve a longing that is easily dispelled whenever it is difficult to fulfill the desires or they appear likely to lead to harm.
Epicurus
Wealth is not his that has it, but his that enjoys it.
Ben Franklin
A good name, like good will, is attained by many actions and may be lost by one.
Unknown
It takes 20 years to build a reputation and five minutes to lose it. If you think about that, you’ll do things differently.
Warren Buffet
The gem cannot be polished without friction, nor a man perfected without trials.
Chinese Proverb
It is only to the extent we develop others that we permanently succeed.
Harvey Firestone
Every job is a self-portrait of the person who did it. Autograph your work with excellence.
Commitment To Excellence
There is no royal road to anything. One thing at a time, all things in succession. That which grows fast, withers as rapidly. That which grows slowly, endures.
Josiah Gilbert Holland
Castles made of sand, fall into the sea, eventually.
Jimi Hendrix
Claims made immodestly are difficult to live up to... The superior man is modest in his speech but exceeds in his actions... He acts before he speaks, and afterwards speaks according to his actions.
Confucius
Remember not only to say the right thing in the right place, but far more difficult still, to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the tempting moment.
Benjamin Franklin
The unspoken word never does harm.
Kossuth
To talk little is natural. High winds do not last all morning; nor does heavy rain last all day.
Lao-tsu
You speak when you cease to be at peace with your thoughts; and in much of your talking, thinking is half murdered.
Kahlil Gibran
Speak clearly, if you speak at all; carve every word before you let it fall.
Oliver Wendell Holmes
Silence makes few mistakes.
Anonymous
Be wiser than other people if you can; but do not tell them so.
Lord Chesterfield
Give every man thy ear, but few thy voice.
William Shakespeare
Never give advice unless asked.
German Proverb
He who knows does not speak. He who speaks does not know.
Lao-tsu
If you reveal your secrets to the wind you should not blame the wind for revealing them to the trees.
Three may keep a secret, if two of them are dead. None are deceived, but they that confide.
Benjamin Franklin
Who gossips to you will gossip about you.
Spanish Proverb
Hear no ill of a friend, nor speak any to an enemy.
Ben Franklin
Virtue is a state of war, and to live in it we have always to combat with ourselves.
Jean-Jacques Rousseau
Much misconstruction and bitterness are spared to him who thinks naturally upon what he owes to others rather than what he ought to expect from them.
Madame Guizot
How much time he saves who does not look to see what his neighbor says or does or thinks.
Marcus Aurelius Antoninus
The purpose of leadership is not to gain followers, but to build more leaders.
Ralph Nader
When anger rises, think of the consequences.
Confucius
Whom the gods would destroy, they first make angry.
Unknown
Beware of the dark side. Anger...fear...aggression. The dark side of the Force are they. Easily they flow, quick to join you in a fight.
Yoda, 'The Empire Strikes Back'
If you tell the truth you don't have to remember anything.
Mark Twain
In matters of style, swim with the current; in matters of principle, stand like a rock.
Thomas Jefferson
What's another word for Thesaurus?
Steven Wright
To read a newspaper is to refrain from reading something worthwhile. The first discipline of education must therefore be to refuse resolutely to feed the mind with canned chatter.
Aleister Crowley
To win without fighting is best.
Sun-Tsu
Wars not make one great.
Yoda, 'The Empire Strikes Back'
Counsel him not to use force to conquer the universe, for this would only cause resistance.
Lao-tsu
Nonviolence is the greatest force at the disposal of mankind.
Mahatma Gandhi
You can’t win an argument.
Dale Carnegie
Wherever you go, go with all your heart.
Confucius
Better fare hard with good men than feast it with bad.
Thomas Paine
Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish and you feed him for a lifetime.
Chinese Proverb
He who asks is a fool for five minutes, but he who does not ask remains a fool forever.
Chinese Proverb
To know the road ahead, ask those coming back.
Chinese Proverb
Examine what is said, not him who speaks.
Arab Proverb
Do not protect yourself by a fence, but rather by your friends.
Czech Proverb
Fall seven times, stand up eight.
Japanese Proverb
When the character of a man is not clear to you, look at his friends.
Japanese Proverb
Let no one ever come to you without leaving better and happier.
Mother Teresa
Own only what you can carry with you; know language, know countries, know people. Let your memory be your travel bag.
Alexander Solzhenitsyn
He who loves the world as his body may be entrusted with the empire.
Lao-tsu
There's a force in the universe that makes things happen, and all you have to do is get in touch with it: stop thinking, let things happen, and be the ball.
Ty Webb, from the movie Caddyshack
No, (it is) no different, only different in your mind. You must unlearn what you have learned.
Yoda, 'The Empire Strikes Back'
The softest things in the world overcome the hardest things in the world. Through this I know the advantage of taking no action.
Lao-tsu
If you can spend a perfectly useless afternoon in a perfectly useless manner, you have learned how to live.
Lin Yutang
He who is attached to things will suffer much. He who is attached to nothing, loses nothing
Lao-tsu
A good manager is best when people barely know that he exists. Not so good when people obey and acclaim him. Worse when they despise him.
Lao-tsu
Creating without claiming, doing without taking credit, guiding without interfering; this is primal virtue.
Lao-tsu
For everyone who exalts himself will be humbled, and he who humbles himself will be exalted
Jesus
He who boasts achieves nothing; he who brags will not endure.
Lao-tsu
The three great American vices seem to be efficiency, punctuality, and the desire for achievement and success. They are the things that make the Americans so unhappy and so nervous.
Lin Yutang
For what shall it profit a man, if he shall gain the whole world, and lose his own soul?
Jesus
The wise embrace the one, and set an example to all.
Not putting on display, they shine forth.
Not justifying themselves, they are distinguished.
Not boasting, they receive recognition.
Not bragging, they never falter.
They do not quarrel, so no one quarrels with them.
Be whole, and all things will come to you.
Lao-tsu
Better stop short than fill to the brim. Over-sharpen the blade, and the edge will soon blunt. Amass a store of gold, and no one can protect it. Claim wealth and titles, and disaster will soon follow. Retire when the work is done. This is the way of heaven.
Lao-tsu
The Sabbath was made for man, not man for the Sabbath.
Jesus
Life moves pretty fast. If you don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it.
Ferris Bueller, from the movie Ferris Bueller's Day Off
It is not leisure if it is not used.
Ben Franklin
It is not when he is working in his office but when he is lying idly on the sand that his soul utters, "Life is beautiful."
Lin Yutang
One who wins the world does so by not meddling with it. One who meddles with the world loses it.
Lao-tsu
You must show courage. Be willing to take a blow, several blows, to show you will not strike back nor will you be turned aside. And when you do that, it calls on something in human nature that makes a man’s hatred for you decrease and his respect increase.
Mahatma Gandhi
They may torture my body, break my bones, even kill me. Then they will have my dead body, not my obedience.
Mahatma Gandhi
Truth, purity, self-control, firmness, fearlessness, humility, unity, peace and renunciation. These are the inherent qualities of a civil resister.
Mahatma Gandhi
You give but little when you give of your possessions; it is when you give of yourself that you truly give.
Kahlil Gibran
If it is a despot you would dethrone, see first that his throne erected within you is destroyed.
Kahlil Gibran
(On children) You may give them your love but not your thoughts, for they have their own thoughts. You may strive to be like them, but seek not to make them like you, for life goes not backward nor tarries with yesterday.
Kahlil Gibran
A smart man learns from his mistakes; a wise man learns from the mistakes of others.
Anonymous
I don't try to jump over seven-foot bars. I look around for one-foot bars that I can step over.
Warren Buffet
The first rule is not to lose money. The second rule is to never forget the first rule.
Warren Buffet
Those who are wise won't be busy, and those who are too busy can't be wise.
Lin Yutang
Someone’s sitting in the shade today because someone planted a tree a long time ago.
Warren Buffet
Investing is an act of faith.
John Bogle
Fear to do ill, and you need fear nothing else.
Ben Franklin
Search others for their virtues, thyself for thy vices.
Ben Franklin
He that falls in love with himself will have no rivals.
Ben Franklin
Early to bed and early to rise, makes a man healthy, wealthy and wise.
Ben Franklin
Diligence is the mother of good luck.
Ben Franklin
You can’t build a reputation on what you’re going to do.
Ben Franklin
If you would not be forgotten as soon as you are dead and rotten, either write things worth reading, or do things worth the writing.
Ben Franklin
Love your enemies, for they tell you your faults.
Ben Franklin
Wish not so much to live long as to live well.
Ben Franklin
Wink at small faults; remember thou hast great ones.
Ben Franklin
And why do you look at the speck in your brother's eye, but do not consider the plank in your own eye? First remove the plank from your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother's eye.
Jesus
He that would live in peace and at ease must not speak all he knows, nor judge all he sees.
Ben Franklin
Each year one vicious habit rooted out, in time might make the worst man good throughout.
Ben Franklin
He that spills the rum loses that only; he that drinks it, often loses himself.
Ben Franklin
Quarrels never could last long, if on one side only lay the wrong.
Ben Franklin
Sin is not hurtful because it is forbidden, but is forbidden because it is hurtful.
Ben Franklin
He is a fool who cannot conceal his wisdom.
Ben Franklin
Doing an injury puts you below your enemy; revenging one makes you but even with him; forgiving it sets you above him.
Ben Franklin
Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.
Jesus
If thou would live long, live well; for folly and wickedness shorten life.
Ben Franklin
An ill wound, but not an ill name, may be healed.
Ben Franklin
Don’t throw stones at your neighbors if your own windows are glass.
Ben Franklin
Let he among you who is without sin cast the first stone.
Jesus
Men take more pains to mask than mend.
Ben Franklin
Keep thy shop, and thy shop will keep thee.
Ben Franklin
Creditors have better memories than debtors.
Ben Franklin
No man’s credit is worth as much as his cash.
Jesse Greenwald
Strange that a man who has wit enough to write a satire should have folly enough to publish it.
Ben Franklin
The just man is most free of perturbation; the unjust man is full of the greatest disturbance.
Epicurus
Of all the things that wisdom provides for living one’s entire life in happiness, the greatest by far is the possession of friendship.
Epicurus
We do not need the help of our friends so much as the confidence that our friends will help us.
Epicurus
Let us completely drive away foul habits, as we would evil men who have done us great harm for a long time.
Epicurus
If you do not break the laws, disturb well-established customs, upset any of your neighbors, do bodily harm to yourself, or waste your resources, give in to your inclinations as you please.
Epicurus
We must free ourselves from the prison of everyday affairs and politics.
Epicurus
You ought to do nothing in your life that will make you afraid if it becomes known by your neighbor.
Epicurus
The greatest fruit of self-sufficiency is freedom.
Epicurus
He who follows nature and not idle opinions is independent in all things.
Epicurus
You can't just ask
customers what they want and then try to give that to them. By the time
you get it built, they'll want something new…. It took us three years to
build the NeXT computer. If we'd given customers what they said they
wanted, we'd have built a computer they'd have been happy with a year
after we spoke to them - not something they'd want now.
Steve Jobs
The radical of one century is the conservative of the next. The radical invents the views. When he has worn them out the conservative adopts them.
Mark Twain
Vain is the word of a philosopher by which no mortal suffering is healed. Just as medicine confers no benefit if it does not drive away bodily disease, so is philosophy useless if it does not drive away the suffering of the mind.
Epicurus
Since the early days of humankind, dancing has always been an expression of feeling good, and making someone feel good is the main intention of DJing. I don’t see the point of playing a record that makes people just stand there, look at you and say, “hmm, very interesting.”
Paul Van Dyk
Passion makes the world go around. Love just makes it a safer place.
Ice T
The visionary lies to himself, the liar only to others.
Friedrich Nietzsche
You must not lose faith in humanity. Humanity is an ocean; if a few drops of the ocean are dirty, the ocean does not become dirty.
Mahatma Gandhi
An eye for an eye makes the whole world blind.
Mahatma Gandhi (attributed)
Victory attained by violence is tantamount to a defeat, for it is momentary.
Mahatma Gandhi
It does not matter how slowly you go so long as you do not stop.
Confucius
Respect yourself and others will respect you.
Confucius
What the superior man seeks is in himself; what the small man seeks is in others.
Confucius
Forget injuries; never forget kindness.
Confucius
The superior man cannot be known in little matters, but he may be entrusted with great concerns. The small man may not be entrusted with great concerns, but he may be known in little matters.
Confucius
Virtue is not left to stand alone. He who practices it will have neighbors.
Confucius
What you do not want done to yourself, do not do to others.
Confucius
If you hate something, don’t you do it too.
Eddie Vedder
The world owes you nothing. It was here first.
Mark Twain
Let us so live that when we come to die even the undertaker will be sorry.
Mark Twain
He had discovered a great law of human action, without knowing it - namely, that in order to make someone covet a thing, it is only necessary to make the thing difficult to obtain.
Mark Twain, "The Adventures of Tom Sawyer"
Love all; trust a few. Do wrong to none.
William Shakespeare